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Rosalie Craig and Company (Photo: Brinkhoff/Mogenburg)

Rosalie Craig and Company (Photo: Brinkhoff/Mogenburg)

New year’s resolutions for theatreland

Eleni Cashell

By Eleni Cashell Published 31 December 2018

As the new year begins, it’s time to start thinking of realistic new year’s resolutions that you won’t break within a fortnight. But no one is perfect, not even in Theatreland, and some of our favourite characters could probably do with making some resolutions of their own.

Just a heads up, some of these resolutions contain minor spoilers of the shows.

The entire cast of The Play That Goes Wrong – Be less clumsy

Katie Bernstein, Jason Callender, Edward Judge, Alastair Kirton, Edward Howells, Meg Mortell, Graeme Rooney, and Patrick Warner in The Play That Goes Wrong

The Cornley Polytechnic Drama Society, (or the cast of the Play that Goes Wrong as they’re commonly known) must be the most uncoordinated, accident-prone group of characters in Theatreland. As they attempt to put on a production, everything goes wrong…literally.

From falling walls and breaking furniture to absent props and minor injuries, nothing ever seems to go right for the amateur dramatics group. So, their new year’s resolution should either be “become less clumsy” or “invest in some stronger staging that doesn’t collapse whenever you shut a door.”

Bobbi from Company – Worry less about what others think

Company at the Gielgud Theatre

A critical success since it first opened, Stephen Sondheim’s iconic musical Company tells the story of Bobbie. As she turns 35, everyone and their mothers are asking her why isn’t she married, why she’s still single and when will she find time to have a family?

The best resolution we can think of for poor Bobbie, who faces continual pressure to settle down, is to worry less about what other people think. She’s a successful woman with friends, family and happy life, what does she need to get married for?

Austin and Lee from True West – Work on their relationship

Johnny Flynn and Kit Harington in True West (Photo: Marc Brenner)

Brothers Austin and Lee have a far from ideal sibling relationship. After both pitching ideas to successful producer Saul Kimmer, the pair argue and quibble over the script, their past, their present and future, basically everything in True West.

But rather than fighting each other for fame and fortune, we think Austin and Lee should treat the new year as a clean slate, and work on building and improving their relationship instead.

Sophie and Donna from Mamma Mia – Learn to communicate better

The London cast of Mamma Mia!

Even the most upbeat, sing-along musicals can still provide new year’s resolutions for its characters, and Mamma Mia is no exception.

While we love the story of Sophie’s potential dads all turning up for her wedding without her mum’s knowledge, we feel had Donna communicated better with her daughter, Sophie probably wouldn’t have gone snooping in her mother’s diary in the first place.

Even though it all worked out for the best, nonetheless we feel like Donna and Sophie could improve their communication and be more honest with each other in order to stop further secrets coming out at inconvenient moments.

Joseph from Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat – Launch a fashion range

Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat at the London Palladium

The sheer beauty of Joseph’s coat of many colours is a sight to behold, and so it seems only right that Joseph takes his fashion expertise onto the high street.

Joseph is certainly someone who can achieve anything he puts his mind to, so if he made it his 2019 resolution to launch a colourful coat range, we’re sure it would be stocked in every retailer before the year was up.

What are you waiting for? Go, go Joseph!

The cast of School Of Rock – Recruit more band members

Craig Gallivan and the kids cast of School Of Rock (Photo: Manuel Harlan)

Based on the movie, this musical has a gig-like element that’s incredible to witness. The young cast of School Of Rock is mind-blowingly good, at not only acting and singing either, but also playing instruments in their super-secret class band.

But you know what’s better than the School of Rock band? More members of the band. Or even more than one band which tours across the UK…and in arenas….

Ok, this one is slightly more unrealistic as a resolution, but you can’t blame us for trying!

Glinda from Wicked – Stop trying to be popular

Wicked London at Apollo Victoria Theatre (Photo: Matt Crockett)

Glinda, the good witch from the Wizard Of Oz, has a slightly different narrative in Wicked than you’d expect, especially when it comes to her friendship with Elphaba (or as she’s known in the original story, “the Wicked Witch of the West”).

But during periods of the show, her desire to be popular and liked by the residents of Oz as she becomes Glinda The Good in her bubble, leads her to make not-so-great decisions, which at times endangers her friend.

We suspect if Glinda stopped trying to be so popular and was just herself she’d still be well-loved, and she wouldn’t put Elphaba in some of the situations she ends up in.

Don from Kinky Boots – Keep accepting someone for who they are

Kinky Boots 2018 Cast

The uplifting musical Kinky Boots is all about accepting people for who they are and just being who you want to be, and nobody learns this lesson more than the character of Don.

Initially the workplace bully, and unaccepting of the land of Lola, Don is challenged to accept someone for who they are, and boy does he rise to the challenge!

His resolution for 2019 is simply to keep up the good work!


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