Professional Grumpy old woman, Splash survivor, amateur soup maker, and novice knitter, Jenny Eclair is younger than Madonna but eats crisps and likes wine.

Here, she offers a simple guide: How To Be A Middle Aged Woman (Without Going Insane).

Semi–bearded and suffering from outbreaks of gout and hysteria, Eclair puts middle age under the microscope and decides whether to laugh, cry or buy a dachshund!

You are most welcome to join her, just button your cardi up properly and wipe that lipstick off your teeth.

This show is recommended for ages 14+.